And now for the lamest post ever...

I've been under the weather all week, so I don't feel much like writing. I don't know what the deal is, but if I don't start feeling not crummy soon, I'm going to lose it!

Before I got the crummies, we had a pretty active week. I was booked to speak Tuesday night at the Snohomish Knitter's Guild, which is an amazing new guild up north of Seattle. Since Wed was President's Day and the kids didn't have school, we decided to make a mini-vacation of it and spend the night at Great Wolf Lodge. Donna and her family came with us, so hubbies and kids hung out and had fun while D & I went up to the guild meeting.

The guild was fabulous. They're very new (I think this was their 3rd meeting) but extremely well-organized. I blabbered about the book and the socks for a little while and then answered a bunch of questions. They then gave everyone about 15 minutes to buy books and patterns, which wasn't nearly long enough (my only complaint about my visit, although to be fair, they could've cut my talk short to give more time but they didn't - kind of like when I let my kids sleep until the last possible minute and then wonder why we can't quite make it to school on time...).

After the meeting wrapped up (they finished up with show-and-tell, which is always great fun when I'm not the one doing the showing/telling), we headed back to Great Wolf, where the kids and Bill were sound asleep after hours of fun at the water park and arcade. The next morning, we wore ourselves completely out in the wave pool. I couldn't talk Sydney into going on the big waterslides with me (poor Owen is still too short), but we had lots of fun in the little kid area. Poor Owen had a bit of a scare when he spotted Bill and started to run towards him, only to be hit with the full brunt of the 1,000 gallon bucket that spills over every 15 minutes or so. Of course I was safely under cover and didn't sacrifice myself for the boy. He was fine - just a little startled! Neither kid can really claim to be afraid of getting their faces wet at swimming lessons after that experience.

The rest of the week I've spent trying to recover from a stomach bug. I don't know if it was something I ate up in Washington or stress or what, but it's really annoying. I went to the doctor this afternoon and he said there's nothing serious wrong with me - I just have to wait it out. I'm happy not to have to medicate, but I'm also annoyed that it doesn't seem to want to go away! I'm also very annoyed to have missed my speaking gig at the Millstream Guild on Saturday. I was not ready to spend that much time standing (or in a place where I couldn't run to the bathroom without leaving behind a room full of people waiting for me to return), so Donna went in my place, bless her! Obviously she couldn't sign books, but she's heard me talk about the socks enough (and she knows the pattern line as well as I do) that I'm sure she was a great substitute.

Now I have to get myself back in action by Thursday for the Tigard Guild - the last of my November guilds. My mom arrives on Friday, and then we have a week of fun leading up to Thanksgiving. How is November half over already?!? Less than two months until TNNA and I am NOT prepared at all. Considering that I spend 50% of the time these days seriously considering shuttering GYW all together (just when it's starting to really cook - that would be smart, now, wouldn't it?), I need to take it one day at a time. If I don't have new designs for TNNA, so be it! Nobody's going to die, right? If it keeps me functional, we might just have to live with it for now.

And now I'm certain I'm not making any sense at all, so it's time to do my evening meditation (and try to talk my stomach into settling down) and go to bed! I will not watch the premiere of Chef Academy I will not watch the premiere of Chef Academy I will not watch the premiere of Chef Academy...

Yeeaaarrrrggggghhhh!

I've got two kids who are on the tail end of being sick. They're still sick enough that we kept them home from school but not sick enough to slow down at all. Therefore, I've got two hyped-up crabby kids that have all this pent-up energy from being stuck in the house, constantly told to "take it easy" for the past week.

It's enough to drive even the most level-headed of moms completely nuts, and I most definitely am not the most level-headed of moms.

Fortunately Bill has been willing to tag-team, but he has the basement office with the door that locks (and clients who have to be called during business hours). I have no such escape. My office door closes, but I really need to install a lock on the inside because a closed door barely slows anyone in this family down.

Owen is driving us crazy taking food that he insists he wants, and then refuses to eat. Two seconds later, he's back, asking for something else.

Sydney has the personality of a wet cat, insists on stretching out across most of the couch and then throws a hissy fit when her brother dares take up more than the little corner where her stretched-out legs don't reach.

It's a good thing there's such a strong biological urge to love and protect your offspring, because otherwise these two would be at the bus station. I don't know how you homeschooling moms do it! Of course, life would be easier if we could actually be out doing things as opposed to staying at home, feeling crummy... I can't wait for this bug to pass.

I've been assuming that the kids have the swine flu. High fever, cough, sore throat... It has been making the rounds here in Portland. The vaccine is impossible to get, and if the kids have already gotten the bug, that's one less dose that could go to someone who's at high risk from complications. Of course, it's impossible to know because the kids haven't been sick enough to take to the doctor, so they haven't been tested. It's amazing how much more quickly Owen recovered than Sydney - we figure it must be due to the fact that he eats about 25 servings of fruits and veggies a day (okay, maybe not 25, but the kid eats a heckuva lot of fruit!).

While the kids recover, I've been doing some swatching for various project submissions. I've been out of the loop for so long (yeah, a month is a long time for me) that it's hard to get back into the habit of knitting several hours a day. Swatches that would normally take me a couple hours to knock out are taking multiple days. But they're getting done, and they're looking quite lovely. I'm taking my sweet time, but I am indeed climbing back into that saddle!

Waxing philosophical...

Yes, I know it's not Monday, but I was reading the opinion page of today's paper and started to feel very philosophical. I've had that problem lately. Must be all the meditation I've been doing...

All the pundits are going on and on about the recent elections, and how the Republicans have gained on the Democrats because the economy sucks, the liberals don't think Obama's doing enough and of course the Republicans think he's doing way too much (and nothing good). The economy is indeed a little worrisome. Okay, a lot worrisome. I try not to think about it too much, because my little business is still in its growth phase and if I get too caught up in talk about what the economy's going to do, I may as well just give up and stay home.

I just ordered 4,000 copies of Toe-Up! It shipped from the printer yesterday. Of course, as soon as I placed the reorder, sales of the books I currently have seemed to come to a screeching halt. I've been mildly concerned about this, but since I was expecting it to take a year to sell out of my first printing, I'm figuring this second printing can last me through 2010 if it needs to. The first printing (the first 2/3rds of it, anyway) seemed to literally fly out the door.

Even if the book doesn't continue to sell as quickly, I like to remind myself of the whole supply chain of the book and all the little fingers it sends out into the world. It's my own little way of helping the economy - my tiny economic stimulus package, if you will. I chose to have the book printed in North America so that I could have a relatively high level of confidence that the people working in the printing press were being treated reasonably well and paid fairly (no sweatshop labor for this book). I chose to use FSC-certified paper for the cover and interior pages so that the environmental impact of the book could be slightly lower, not that that necessarily has anything to do with economic benefits (other than the fact that the paper is slightly more expensive in order to help cover the increased cost of sustainably managing the forests). The books are transported by truck from Canada, then delivered by a local freight receiver here in the Portland area. Then, they're sold to yarn shops across the country.

How many little roots does this send out? Well, the printing press keeps a number of people employed (it's a family business located in Manitoba), and my sales rep works out of a small office in California. Shipping the books helps out the trucker who drives them south, not to mention the gas stations, restaurants and other services the trucker uses on his trip. Once here, the freight company is busy for one morning delivering the boxes to our house. Then, Bill is busy for the rest of the day stashing boxes in various closets and out-of-the-way corners (although he doesn't get paid, other than in gratitude from me!).

Then, the books head back out the door, providing benefit to either the postal, FedEx or UPS workers who manage the shipping of the boxes. Once they reach the yarn store, the sale of those books help to provide a living to both the yarn shop owner and his/her employees. Since nearly every yarn shop that sells my books is a small local business, the dollars that knitters spend on those books (and the yarn that they inevitably will be tempted to buy along with it) stay in the local community to everyone's benefit.

Yes, that's sort of a long convoluted train of thought, but even if the books sit in my house for months, I can still feel good that I contributed to the first half of that chain of micro-economics. And every time you buy something at your LYS, you can feel good about the fact that you're helping to support many small businesses - not just the shop you're in, but all the small publishers, yarn companies, and the people they employ.

And on a totally unrelated note - Sydney's right top front tooth just fell out! Tooth fairy's going to be at our house tonight!

Because I'm lame about updating my website...

I'm just going to do a blog post about my upcoming events. I was lax about updating the web page before, but since The Big Crash, I just don't have it in me to even think about it.

So here's what's happening in November!

This Saturday (Nov 7), from 1-2 pm at The Naked Sheep in N Portland, Toe-Up Bind-Off class followed by a book signing from 2 pm until ??? If there are people showing up, I'll stay until 3-3:30. If nobody comes (waaaayah!), I'll probably take off about 2:30. Sydney and I have a date to the symphony that night.

On Tuesday, Nov 10, I'll be speaking at the Snohomish Guild up north of Seattle starting at 7 pm.

On Saturday, Nov 14, I'll be speaking at the Millstream Guild down in Salem, OR, starting at 9:30 am.

On Thursday, Nov 19, I'll be at the Tigard Knitting Guild in good old Tigard, OR (one of my local guilds). At this meeting, in addition to talking about the book, I'll be doing a quick afterthought heel demo.

The Toe-Up! trunk show is going to be traveling to Haymarket, Virginia, where it will be on display at Needles in the Haymarket (15125 Washington St #316) from around Nov 10 to Dec 1.

Whew! That's a lot of guilds this month! Guilds rock - go join one if you haven't already.

It's Monday!

And here I am, as promised! I know it's after 8 pm on the east coast, but I reserve the right to post anytime before midnight PST. I'm working away on my new laptop, nursing a kid with the flu and practicing my mindfulness while trying not to kill the other kid due to his extreme naughtiness. He's currently filling the sink in the bathroom, attempting to prove my theory that if the floor gets wet enough, the entire bathroom will fall into the basement. Sometimes I think that when I tell him a consequence like that he sees it as a challenge rather than a deterrent... Boys!

Still no knitting happening here. I've been working on Owen's stocking:



Here's a close-up:



It's even cuter now that Santa has a head. As soon as this is done, I'm starting on the felt Advent Calendar and then Sydney's Sugarplum Fairy stocking, which I may have to completely wing since the replacement instructions have not arrived in the mail as promised...

I also spent much of the week furiously sewing Halloween costumes. I managed to finish everything on time and both kids were adorable as could be.





Aren't they cute (and can you believe I made them)? Of course, it couldn't be Halloween without someone getting sick. Sydney went to bed with a fever on Friday night but managed to rally for trick-or-treating (fortunately, an activity that doesn't involve much spreading of germs - I made sure she didn't stick her hands into any bowls of candy). She's still really sick but at least doesn't seem to be getting worse. I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop and for Owen to get the fever. So far, so good, but it's always just a matter of time with these two (what one gets, so does the other).

The week was so hectic I didn't get a chance to do much interesting cooking or baking, but I did make cream scones from Alice Waters' Art of Simple Food for breakfast yesterday. They took literally 5 minutes to stir up and were really yummy. I also spent much of the afternoon yesterday jarring up and pressure canning a 10-lb tuna I got from a local fisherman a few weeks ago. My foodie friend Chris and her husband helped me through the process, thank goodness (Mike knows his way around a fish - something that I, having been raised vegetarian, most definitely do not). There's nothing more intimidating than a giant dead fish staring at you with its glassy little eye (in this case, the eye was bigger than a quarter - not so little!). I actually had two fish, but the second turned out to be too far gone. Mike buried it in their backyard, where hopefully it will turn into some awesome compost in a few years. It was sad to not be able to eat any of that gorgeous fish.

Interestingly, the subject of fish was the second topic on Fresh Air this afternoon on NPR. There was a sustainable fishing expert on as Teri's guest, talking about how incredibly devastating our current factory fishing industry is. They basically go out on these giant ships and locate the schools of fish using the same technology the navy uses to locate submarines. There's no guesswork or "Perfect Storm"-type marriage of fishermen and the sea - it's very precise and incredibly hard on the ocean ecosystem. I was reminded of how lucky we are to live here in the Pacific NW where we can go to the coast and get sustainably-caught seafood from local fisherman. Oregon has the only certified sustainable shrimpery in the world. Even better, our local grocery store, New Seasons, marks all their fish based on sustainability criteria (they have green - good to go, yellow - okay in moderation but with some potential health/sustainability issues, red - avoid), making it really easy to see at a quick glance what the best options are when you're at the meat counter. Have I mentioned before how much I adore New Seasons?

I had another interesting experience last night, when I attended my first Buddhist meditation session at a center in SE Portland. I didn't stay for the whole thing since I was worried about my sick girl (and Bill was nursing a pinched nerve in his neck all weekend - fortunately that seems to have dissipated), but I'm seeing so much possibility in meditation practice. A few weeks ago, on a whim, I checked The Complete Idiot's Guide to Buddhism out of the library. Several years ago, my mom went with us to Hawaii for a week and found a little orange book, like a Buddhist version of the Gideon Bible, in her hotel's nightstand. She read it and told me how fascinating and insightful she thought it was. I wasn't really at a place in my life where I was interested or ready, but I must've filed that thought away until something brought it to the surface recently (no idea what - I can't remember exactly why I was inspired to check that book out).

I haven't talked much about this, but I've suffered from depression off and on (pretty severely at times) since Sydney was born. I've been on and off of Zoloft, and for awhile I was resigned to the fact that I'd just be on it forever, like an insulin-dependent diabetic. Then, I read The Omega-3 Connection, which is by a researcher who has experienced great success treating psychological conditions like depression, anxiety, ADHD and even schizophrenia with fish oil. His theory is that our modern diet, which is extremely low in Omega-3 oils (in particular, DHA, which is almost exclusively available from oily fish), is to blame for much of the increase in these mental illnesses. He noted that pregnancy and breastfeeding in particular depletes the mother of Omega-3s because the baby takes what it needs. If the mother doesn't have an adequate reserve, the baby will totally drain her, resulting in issues like PPD (post-partum depression). When I read this, it made so much sense. I've been taking fish oil supplements for about a month now and I feel fantastic.

In looking around for other ways to feel better without Big Pharm, I stumbled across yoga (which I used to do all the time but haven't regularly since I was pregnant with sydney) and meditation. Meditation naturally led to Buddhism, and after I read a little bit about Buddhist philosophy, it made so much sense I had to check it out for myself. One of the things I really like about it is that it's more philosophy than religion. I'd always assumed it was some sort of mysticism with one or more deities, but in fact Buddhists don't really worship any higher power (beyond one's own mind and the natural Buddha nature therein). There's so much potential there for getting rid of the negative, harmful thinking that my depression and anxiety really feed off of. I'm still at the point where it doesn't all make perfect sense, but I'm ready to learn! I figure it can't hurt...

Check back next week, same time, same station, for more cooking, baking, sewing, mental health-improving (and maybe even knitting - !) fun with the Gardiner family. Happy November!